Exiting the house, turn left. Walk. Wearing a jacket, the weather is perfect. Not sunny with a high of 75 perfect. It’s chilly this time but not cold. 830am and not a single person can be seen or heard. The building my church gathers in is only two blocks away, but the walk is an experience long enough to remember. Clouds are grey, birds are out but silent, playing in the hedge and flying away as I walk too close. I’ve got my travelers cup of coffee in hand and I pop it open hearing a quick reply of an echo from the houses around me. Take a drink. It’s good. I’m already at church.
These are the small moments I love to dwell in and appreciate them for what they are, no matter how insignificant in time or usefulness. I can also remember another of these times in Bohumin, Czech Republic, walking to the village train station. I think I was headed to Tuesday morning meetings in Frydlant at the JV offices. The atmosphere was similarly grey all around , if not darker. Fog was thick around me, only leaving room to see my next few steps and any reflectors as one or two cars passed by. It was a good fifteen minute walk to the station, one I was used to by this time. I could see my breathe as it became just another drop in the ocean of fog, like a million other people had passed through leaving the fog behind. A few hundred breathes as my contribution to the infinite amount around me. Sounds a lot like life.
Ive often heard the illustration in church about stretching a string from one wall, across the stage to the other side of the building and calling it eternity. Already, its flawed since there is no beginning or end to eternity but we all get the point don’t we? Then the pastor pulls out a marker and makes the smallest of dashes on the string and calls it life. Your life. just a vapor, here one moment, gone the next. a drop in the ocean, a grain of sand on the beach. To be realistic of the scale, you could make the dash half its original width and we would be closer to its realistic scale. Actually you could keep making it half as small forever and you would continually get closer but never reach it. That’s the real scale of eternity. Whether one believes in a God or not, the truth remains. Our life is unbelievably and continuously tinier compared to the rest of time. What are we doing with it? Does that time amount to anything to you? Are you doing something for God’s glory? For science? For the human race? For yourself? When we’re gone, we are gone. We can’t take anything with us but we can leave something behind. We can leave a legacy. For selfish or selfless reasons, we can leave a memory of ourselves, of what our life amounted to. What was it about?
“How we live our days, is how we live our lives” – Annie Dillard
Right now my day-to-day life is about working at Starbucks, coming home to friends and enjoying my time. I go to church, serving where I can in the youth group or with music on Sundays and Wednesdays. Three months ago my life was hanging out with hundreds of high-schoolers I had just met and sharing the gospel with them and when necessary using words to do so. In high contrast, my current life can’t even compare to that, but to be fair, I’m here in Kansas for a bigger reason. Not to work at Starbucks but to find those that believe in what I do in Eastern Europe so much that they will pray for me and send me out financially. I plan to return to the Czech Republic this Fall and I am looking for those people. That is the sole reason I’m here, otherwise I would be back in California enjoying my time playing in a band and living “the dream”. I’m not hiding it or disguising it, I plan to be a missionary and that’s why I’m here, plain and honest. Will you help me?
I’ve received my application for next fall and once completed and accepted, I will begin to raise support for my next trip to Eastern Europe. I only ask now that you pray for me. This is a big thing and so often underestimated. We are speaking to THE maker. Afterwards we should listen to Him and give Him a turn without interrupting. This is what I ask of you if you believe such things are possible. Please pray for me.